Today is a sad day. Today is a day who wouldn't have come. Today isn't a gift.
But today I'm writing this post and I dedicate it to Nick and his sister.
I don't know how I should start this and I don't know if it's gonna make any difference for you that I'm here or that I'm crying 'cause of what happened.
I'm not gonna write about how you shouldn't be upset because you should be.
I'm not gonna write about how you should smile because there is nothing you would smile at.
I'm not gonna write about how your tears aren't gonna bring her back because you know that.
Everything you wanna do is allowed right now.
You can cry, you can be angry, you can break things, you can run, you can do whatever you feel like doing.
You will miss her.
You will remember every single time she smiled.
And when you do it's gonna be life a thousand knives aim for your heart.
The feeling you get...the empty hole in your heart.
It's like someone ripped half of you and you're never gonna find that half.
I'm ripped myself, I've been this way for over a year and a half and no...it never gets better.
The feeling stays.
It's always there even if you think it's not.
You will learn ignoring it but you will always know it's staying.
You will think you can't handle it but you'll be wrong.
You gotta do your best now that she's gone.
And if you ever need somebody.
If you ever need to share something.
If you ever find yourself without a buddy.
Just call my name and I will try to respond.

I'm keeping her in my prayers!!
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